More Meat than Rice!

In d face of Covid and the new normal, man just cyah come and go as they please anymore. So we hadda find a new way of doing things; this includes entertaining the people man. So in d spirit of lock-down diplomacy, how yuh does go about asking a woman to borrow she man for a quick appointment? Life - It ain't easy but it sweet!

Well the real shit is how I end up in the middle of a cafe in Belmont in a towel tuck into a panty. "I lose mih bag I lose mih hat i lose mih clothes I lose mih keys i lose mih wallet." "yuh lose yuh bag yuh lose yuh hat yuh lose yuh clothes yuh lose yuh keys yuh lose yuh wallet? Jesso jesso? yuh wallet? jesso?" "he lose he bag he lose he hat he lose he clothes he lose he keys he lose he wallet? Jesso jesso? He wallet? jesso?" Allyuh yuh know is shit we like so by the time the third somebody repeat it you know is because they make a whole rhythm section and man wining like this ain't one of the saddest and most peculiar things they ever did see: a grown man stand-up normal normal in the middle of a stranger kitchen in a towel and a panty. Well yuh remember how the Corona come and mash up Carnival 2021, so the government decide to treat the big football match and dem like it was a small carnival nah. So say come and all the teams come in the ...

So IF you know me you'd know that I had a magical childhood. I spent many an evening scrambling to do homework running between piano lessons and state dinners at the President's house or awards at the Prime Minister's residence. While most were in bed I was struggling to keep my eyes open as limbo dancers twirled by flambeau or jumping out of sleep's grasp, startled, when audiences erupted in ovation. Yes that's me, International superstar before I was even a teen. Some TV  stations still play my music video at Christmas time; cute as can be in my duck-egg-blue bowtie and cummerbund to match. As a result of my early adventures, constant rehearsals and a few other things, very early on I became the friend that's not coming. Especially these days, where I big and fat, if it's not something real easy and casual like going to Starbucks to people watch or to the movies or beach, I'm not coming. I've been on lockdown now for at least 6 months, or at le...

De way people was running out of Massy yesterday with tray upon tray of fried chicken really made me stop and think about the kind of people were are as Trinidadians. What hurt me the most about the display is that no one seemed to care that I too stood in the line and waited for said chicken. Finally when I realized that I wouldn't be getting any I was so crushed that I sank to the floor in a fit of tears. I decided that the only way to spend my grief would be to clearly roll from one end of Massy to the other. A woman had the impertinence to lift the edge of her skirt and say to me "excuse me" politely while stepping over me as if I wasn't giving the greatest performance of my life. How very dare she? I received no sympathy or understanding from the security personnel at Massy as they tried to stop me and pick me up off the floor. It was only when it was already 7 of them and I heard them radio for backup that I thought I better make a quiet exit for my mo...

Well Hear nah. Is because being a Trini is really something special that you can’t explain to anyone else in the world nah. We are undefeated at every turn yuh know. Is shit, after shit and what we doing? Well if we ain’t laughing we wining, if we ain’t wining we on the beach drinking rum. How you mean how I mean? You ain’t hear? Girl, I busy out on the Charlotte this morning I say let me get in town and buy some extra panty for the chirren. Well yuh know since they home from school is only ramp and skin whole day and I decide they ain’t go hurt up my head with a setta laundry every other day so. How you mean? Nah I cyah see dem clothes pile up; is every other day I does be running that washing machine. You real boldface, is what I buy it for? Anyway so girl I now put the little panty and dem in mih bag and I run across the road. No girl mih Massy bag. You know I doh leave home without it. Ha! You right Massy ain't know what they do when they start  with dem bag; and...