Salty PorkyFacebook!

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The way my pride is set up I could be home crying your name into my pillow every nite but you will never hear from me again.¯\_(ツ)_/¯


Life - It ain't easy but it sweet!

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Salty Porky Facbook! - Pre-dawn Old girls

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Good Morning. I need a representative from the Old Folks Association to help me out with this one. Where THE HELL old people does be walkin going at 4 and 5 in the morning? I've observed over the years that its especially little old women walking on deserted streets in POS BY THEMSELVES. By yourself on Duke Street At 4am? Richmond Street 430am? On the loneliest of streets Oxford Street Really? Where could you be going? Is there a geriatric flexx-out that y'all hustling home from? This is not safe and I'm often so worried about you all. Stay home until the sun begins to rise. See if you could turn some flour and make a bake. Entice yur children out of bed with said bake and they will drop you where you need to go. Unless its really a granny orgy or something like that and then that's just nasty. Concerned, Management Life - It ain't easy but it sweet!
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MACO Central!

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Anybody   have a nosy neighbor? Allyuh I have a nosy neighbor when I tell you she is nosy. I don't even know why I being polite; 'bout nosy. De woman is a MACO! A know everybody bizness, talks everybody bizness, see everybody and know them by name, good old fashion corner house MACO! De only ting is that she not livin on no corner. De only bizness I sure she does forget to tell is who is de man dat does come een by she around 9pm and leave 5am with lunch kit well packed. I tell you no lies, but doh say I say. Hear nah, if the wind blow too hard and shake the gate that beauty in her window.    If someone come to drop something for you is bcuz she pulling curtain.  I kid you not. You could be sitting on a cloud, eating cotton candy, in the most genkle, genklest way possible and that beauty in her window to see what happening. Needless to say when they come and thief away mih whole place she ent see or hear NOTHING! Life - It ain't easy but it s...
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"Straight man" Chronicles - Ep. 3

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# straightmanchronicles SO I on the avenue beating mih body one nite. Yuh stroll up to me and call mih name. We chat for a 2 minutes and yuh went your way. Now I slightly moist bcuz I always knew you would glow up but not THIS MUCH. SO couple days later I gets on the Facebook and add you as a friend, bcuz I decide I hadda throw my corn. **NB** Now by all the 9-10pm hour man done message around, and more often than they'd like to admit, done get blank from their regular roster of birds. AND I happen to know for a fact that from about half-past midnite to around 2:26am man does be online looking for ANY trouble to dip...I mean drown they sorrows in. **** SO being myself I didnt waste any time on small talk. I jump een yuh INBOX and say what on my mind. Oh, yuh take off behind me talkin about how you despise "homosexual sex and everything that it represents" and all kindsa long talk. SO I hit yuh a full-on "burr???" like Scooby-Doo when he confuse...
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